"The HOW Behind The Hurt" - An Online Course for Unfaithful Partners
You Ended the Affair. You Apologized.
But things are still a mess at home.
This course shows you why the apology wasn’t enough—and gives you the tools to rebuild the trust and respect you thought you’d already earned back.
This short video message from Beth can save your marriage.
Click the image to play.
If You're Thinking “We Should Be Past This by Now”… You’re Not Alone.
Most men in your shoes believe that once the affair is over, and they've committed to never doing "that" again, the worst is behind them. It's all out and time to move on. But that's where they're wrong.
The truth is, stopping the affair and apologizing is only the first mile of a marathon you didn’t know you’d signed up for. What’s keeping your marriage stuck isn’t your wife’s unwillingness to move on— it’s the unfinished work inside you that she can still feel every day.
If You're Thinking “We Should Be Past This by Now”… You’re Not Alone.
Most men in your shoes believe that once the affair is over, and they've committed to never doing "that" again, the worst is behind them. It's all out and time to move on. But that's where they're wrong.
The truth is, stopping the affair and apologizing is only the first mile of a marathon you didn’t know you’d signed up for. What’s keeping your marriage stuck isn’t your wife’s unwillingness to move on— it’s the unfinished work inside you that she can still feel every day.
The HOW Behind the Hurt™
A Straight-Forward Program for Men Who Want to Do the Right Thing—Even if They’re Not Sure What That Means Yet
In each session, we’ll walk you through the hidden stories, excuses, and distorted memories that fueled your choices.
And show you how to dismantle them so you can finally lead your marriage with honesty and strength.
Here are just some of the benefits:
Explain HOW you did this to your partner
Gain emotional strength so you can stop getting defensive
Cut off the thinking and behavior that led you off course
Move your relationship forward and stop feeling stuck
Give your partner the answers to their questions
Become trustable again
Stop hiding and start being real with yourself and with your partner
Live an Honest, Authentic Life
Read Through These and See How Many Apply To You:
Your spouse keeps asking, “How could you do this?” and you don’t have a real answer.
You try to move forward, but end up back in the same arguments, wondering if anything will ever change.
Home feels like a war zone. There’s tension in every room, and no matter what you say, it never seems like the right thing.
You’re stuck in a cycle of guilt, defensiveness, and silence and it's tearing both of you apart.
You wonder if there's any way to rebuild… or if you're doomed to carry the shame and anger forever.
Read Through These and See How Many Apply To You:
Your spouse keeps asking, “How could you do this?” and you don’t have a real answer.
You try to move forward, but end up back in the same arguments, wondering if anything will ever change.
Home feels like a war zone. There’s tension in every room, and no matter what you say, it never seems like the right thing.
You’re stuck in a cycle of guilt, defensiveness, and silence and it's tearing both of you apart.
You wonder if there's any way to rebuild… or if you're doomed to carry the shame and anger forever.
You’ve Solved Hard Problems Before—But This Time, the Work Needs To Be Different.
You’ve faced tough jobs, solved high-stakes problems, and often figured things out on your own. That resourcefulness has served you well—until now.
The thoughts, habits, and blind spots that led to betrayal aren’t things you can out-think or power through the way you tackle a project at work.
The HOW Behind the Hurt™ gives you a proven, step-by-step process to see what you’ve missed, dismantle the stories that kept you stuck, and finally change the patterns that got you here—one concrete step at a time.
Here’s How It Works When You're Trying To Fix Things After Betrayal
Identify What You’ve Overlooked – Most men think the problem ended when the affair ended. In reality, the drivers of betrayal live in the stories you’ve told yourself for years—about your marriage, about your needs, about who you are. The first step of the course helps you slow down, shine a light on those hidden beliefs, and finally see the patterns that were shaping your choices long before the affair began.
Follow a Clear Framework for Self-Work – Instead of guessing what to do or trying to “be better” by willpower alone, you’ll move through 8 structured sessions that walk you step-by-step through reflection, accountability, and change. You’ll learn to recognize the justifications you used, how you rewrote the past to excuse yourself, and how to replace those distortions with the truth that leads to genuine transformation.
Break Old Cycles for Good – This isn’t about saying the right words to your wife; it’s about becoming a man who no longer needs the old defenses that caused the damage in the first place. By the end of the course you’ll have the tools to interrupt the habits and thinking that kept you stuck, to respond instead of react, and to build the kind of integrity and consistency that gives your marriage a real chance to heal.
Here's What You’ll Get Inside The HOW Behind the Hurt™ Online Course
This isn’t another lecture or a list of things your wife wants from you.
Each session is built to guide you through a specific piece of the inner work—so you’re not left wondering what to do next or why it matters.
The lessons build on each other, moving you step by step from confusion to clarity, and from defensiveness to genuine change.
Session 1: The Progression of an Affair
Begin your journey by looking closely at how betrayal happens not just the events, but the mental and emotional patterns that made it possible. You’ll explore how your brain learned to justify actions that went against your values, and why those justifications felt believable in the moment. This foundational session helps you shift from blame to clarity, setting the stage for lasting personal growth and deeper integrity.
Session 2: Dismantling The Justifications
In this session, you’ll uncover the real impact of the stories you told yourself to make betrayal feel acceptable. Whether it was self-pity, resentment, or rewriting the truth, you’ll begin to see how your mind created a false narrative and how to challenge it. This work lays the groundwork for honest change and helps you reconnect with the truth you’ve been avoiding.
Session 3: The Four Layers Of HOW
Here, you’ll break betrayal into four distinct categories: the lies you told yourself, the way you rewrote the marriage, the victim role you assumed, and the consequences you downplayed. This structure makes it easier to organize your thoughts and take full ownership of your choices not just the behavior, but the mindset behind it.
Session 4: Drafting Your Full HOW Statement
Using what you’ve uncovered so far, you’ll begin writing your full HOW statement. You’ll be guided step-by-step to reflect deeply, incorporate specific examples, and begin creating something honest, personal, and powerful. This isn’t just a writing exercise it’s a critical turning point where truth replaces defensiveness.
Session 5: Finalizing and Presenting the Truth
This final session helps you complete and refine your HOW statement with humility and clarity. You’ll also explore how you presented yourself to others including your affair partner and your spouse and why honesty now matters more than ever. It’s about closing the gap between who you were and who you want to become, so you can start showing up as a man of truth, empathy, and integrity.
Session 1: The Progression of an Affair
Begin your journey by looking closely at how betrayal happens not just the events, but the mental and emotional patterns that made it possible. You’ll explore how your brain learned to justify actions that went against your values, and why those justifications felt believable in the moment. This foundational session helps you shift from blame to clarity, setting the stage for lasting personal growth and deeper integrity.
Session 2: Dismantling The Justifications
In this session, you’ll uncover the real impact of the stories you told yourself to make betrayal feel acceptable. Whether it was self-pity, resentment, or rewriting the truth, you’ll begin to see how your mind created a false narrative and how to challenge it. This work lays the groundwork for honest change and helps you reconnect with the truth you’ve been avoiding.
Session 3: The Four Layers Of HOW
Here, you’ll break betrayal into four distinct categories: the lies you told yourself, the way you rewrote the marriage, the victim role you assumed, and the consequences you downplayed. This structure makes it easier to organize your thoughts and take full ownership of your choices not just the behavior, but the mindset behind it.
Session 4: Drafting Your Full HOW Statement
Using what you’ve uncovered so far, you’ll begin writing your full HOW statement. You’ll be guided step-by-step to reflect deeply, incorporate specific examples, and begin creating something honest, personal, and powerful. This isn’t just a writing exercise it’s a critical turning point where truth replaces defensiveness.
Session 5: Finalizing and Presenting the Truth
This final session helps you complete and refine your HOW statement with humility and clarity. You’ll also explore how you presented yourself to others including your affair partner and your spouse and why honesty now matters more than ever. It’s about closing the gap between who you were and who you want to become, so you can start showing up as a man of truth, empathy, and integrity.
Meet Your Guide: Beth Fischer
I focus on helping unfaithful partners because I’ve seen too many good men try to power through this on their own—believing that ending the affair and apologizing should be enough.
I know what’s missing in that approach, and I know exactly how to guide you through the deeper work that changes not just your marriage, but you.
I’m Beth Fischer, the creator of The Integrity Journey® and the Betrayal Trauma Healing Method®.
I hold a Master’s Degree in Counseling, and I’m a Certified NLP Master Practitioner and Certified Root Cause Therapist.
Over the past two decades, I’ve worked with 17,000+ individuals and couples worldwide to help them understand betrayal, rebuild integrity, and heal the trauma it causes.
This course comes from the same framework I’ve used with unfaithful partners in live coaching groups and private sessions—now available as an on-demand program you can work through privately, at your own pace.
Real Stories from Men Who Started Off Thinking They Didn't Need This Either
We’ve worked with numerous therapists over the years, but Beth stands out as one of the most empathetic, engaged, and knowledgeable professionals we’ve encountered. My wife and I often compare her expertise in betrayal trauma to that of a specialized surgeon; she approaches her work with the same precision and depth of understanding.
I have had other therapists, and you were the first one to really offer to help me go in-depth with my past. At the same time, you doing that helped so many other aspects of my hurt, which of course, helped my marriage unimaginably and a new perspective of who I am and how much my wife means to me. I really did want to stay married but realized I could not do it without your help to drill down. I sleep better, am calmer, not as quick to anger or be perturbed, and most of all to love her with all of my being.
I figured I’d heard it all before. Turns out I hadn’t. This course showed me things I never would’ve spotted on my own.
Your material is the best I have come across when it comes to this subject of couples navigating the challenging waters of betrayal.
I didn’t expect to like it. But the sessions were simple to follow and hit closer to home than I wanted to admit. It’s a lot of work—more than I thought—but it was worth every bit of the effort.
it’s so obvious that you care about us and our healing while still being able to compassionately hold the stance that we made some really poor decisions in our lives and really hurt those we have stated we have been loving. Being on this side of the wreckage, it’s amazing to me just how deluded and confused we can be and just how much damage we can do by acting from within that state of self-delusion. Thank you!
This Is Your Road Back To Strength and Integrity
Wake Up to the Real Story. Your brain has been feeding you half-truths about your marriage, your partner, and yourself. The first step is breaking through that fog and seeing what really led you here.
Step 1
Step 2
Own Your Patterns, Not Just Your Mistakes. It wasn’t “just a bad decision.” You’ll dig into the thoughts and mental shortcuts that made betrayal even an option so you can stop repeating them through honest awareness.
Stop Making Your Spouse the Problem. Your brain shifted reality and convinced yourself that your circumstances caused you to have an affair. This is a clever trick your brain used to justify cheating that you will finally have clarity around.
Step 3
Step 4
Rewire the Way You Think. Your brain got you into this. Now it’s time to re-train it. You’ll learn how to challenge your old justifications and build a new internal code based on truth, accountability, and strength.
Face Your Partner with Integrity. You’ll learn how to show up for the hard conversations not with defenses or empty apologies, but with grounded truth and clarity that rebuild trust.
Step 5
Become the Person You Thought You Were. Not the one who hides or avoids or escapes. The one who’s solid, honest, present. This is where you rebuild your life—from the inside out.
Your Road Back to Strength and Integrity
Step: 1
Wake Up to the Real Story. Your brain has been feeding you half-truths about your marriage, your partner, and yourself. The first step is breaking through that fog and seeing what really led you here.
Step: 2
Own Your Patterns, Not Just Your Mistakes. It wasn’t “just a bad decision.” You’ll dig into the thoughts and mental shortcuts that made betrayal even an option so you can stop repeating them through honest awareness.
Step: 3
Stop Making Your Spouse the Problem. Your brain shifted reality and convinced yourself that your circumstances caused you to have an affair. This is a clever trick your brain used to justify cheating that you will finally have clarity around.
Step: 4
Rewire the Way You Think. Your brain got you into this. Now it’s time to re-train it. You’ll learn how to challenge your old justifications and build a new internal code based on truth, accountability, and strength.
Step: 5
Face Your Partner with Integrity. You’ll learn how to show up for the hard conversations not with defenses or empty apologies, but with grounded truth and clarity that rebuild trust.
Step: 6
Become the Person You Thought You Were. Not the one who hides or avoids or escapes. The one who’s solid, honest, present. This is where you rebuild your life from the inside out.
Rebuild Yourself. Rebuild Your Relationship.
"The HOW Behind The Hurt" online course
The HOW Behind the Hurt™ is a step-by-step course, recorded with a live group of unfaithful partners, designed to help you uncover the thought patterns, justifications, and distortions that made betrayal possible.
Through honest reflection and clear guidance, you’ll learn how to break free from the mindset that led you here and finally understand what drove your choices. This isn’t about beating yourself up. It’s about building the clarity, ownership, and emotional strength it takes to rebuild trust and become the man you want to be.
What Will You Gain In This Course?
Uncover the exact mindset and internal patterns that made betrayal possible
Expose the rationalizations and false narratives you used to justify your actions
Learn how your thoughts shaped your behavior and how to take full control back
See clearly how you showed up in all areas of your life
Take full ownership of your actions, your energy, and your influence
Begin leading with truth, showing up with strength, and rebuilding trust from the inside out
"The HOW Behind The Hurt" is right for you if you are ready to:
Face the Real Story Behind the Betrayal
Understand how your brain rewired your reality to make betrayal feel justifiable and finally get honest about what really happened.
Rebuild Trust the Right Way
Learn what accountability actually looks like because healing doesn’t happen through apologies alone, especially when your brain has been hiding the truth from even you.
Replace Excuses with Ownership
Expose the mental loops and protective beliefs that kept you disconnected, and retrain your mind to choose responsibility over justification.
Regain Your Self-Respect
Undo the cognitive shortcuts that sabotaged your integrity and step into a version of yourself that’s clear, grounded, and aligned with who you want to be.
Redefine Who You Want to Be
Rebuild your identity with truth and discipline not ego, not shame by understanding how your thoughts shaped your actions.
Build Strength That Lasts
Train your emotional and mental resilience so your nervous system stops running the show and you can show up with courage, even when it’s hard.
"The HOW Behind The Hurt" is right for you if you are ready to:
Face the Real Story Behind the Betrayal
Understand how your brain rewired your reality to make betrayal feel justifiable and finally get honest about what really happened.
Rebuild Trust the Right Way
Learn what accountability actually looks like because healing doesn’t happen through apologies alone, especially when your brain has been hiding the truth from even you.
Replace Excuses with Ownership
Expose the mental loops and protective beliefs that kept you disconnected, and retrain your mind to choose responsibility over justification.
Regain Your Self-Respect
Undo the cognitive shortcuts that sabotaged your integrity and step into a version of yourself that’s clear, grounded, and aligned with who you want to be.
Redefine Who You Want to Be
Rebuild your identity with truth and discipline not ego, not shame by understanding how your thoughts shaped your actions.
Build Strength That Lasts
Train your emotional and mental resilience so your nervous system stops running the show and you can show up with courage, even when it’s hard.
Own Your Story. Change the Ending.
Uncover the internal patterns that made betrayal possible and finally understand how your mind made it feel justified. This course helps you dismantle the thoughts, stories, and habits that disconnected you from your values, so you can rebuild your life on truth, integrity, and real connection.
Step into a deeper level of healing with The HOW Behind the Hurt™ an intensive online course built for those ready to understand how betrayal became possible. Across five powerful sessions, you’ll examine the mental shortcuts, emotional disconnection, and distorted thinking that allowed you to justify the affair. Through guided teaching, targeted exercises, and step-by-step support, you’ll learn to take full ownership of your actions and start showing up with truth, strength, and emotional clarity.
As you move through each session of The HOW Behind the Hurt™ , you’ll embark on a no-excuses journey of self-confrontation and growth. You’ll uncover how your mind rewrote reality to make betrayal seem acceptable and how emotional disconnection, distorted beliefs, and avoidance of consequences all played a role. With every step, you’ll gain sharper emotional insight, learn to disrupt old patterns, and begin living with greater integrity. By the end of the course, you won’t just understand what you did you’ll finally see how you let it happen and how to make sure it never happens again.
Money Back Guaranteed
I am fully committed to your growth and transformation through my 'The HOW Behind The Hurt™' course. That's why I offer a money back guarantee. If, after listening to the first two sessions within 14 days of purchase, and before you start the third session, and you applying the strategies and exercises provided, you don't feel I've delivered on my promise, simply reach out. I'll work with you to address your concerns or offer a full refund. Your journey towards living an authentic, honest life is my top priority, and I'm here to support you every step of the way. Trust in my program to be the catalyst for change you've been seeking, with the peace of mind that your satisfaction is guaranteed.
PURCHASE TODAY TO RECEIVE THIS EXCLUSIVE BONUS COURSE
Ready to take the leap? Click below to purchase the The HOW Behind The Hurt™ online course and claim your exclusive bonus now! Transform your life with the support, tools, and the community a you need to thrive. This is your moment to take action!
Roadblocks to Reconciliation - Online Course
Unlock your first free bonus, the insightful "Roadblocks to Reconciliation" video. In this comprehensive 19-minute guide, you'll discover the three major obstacles couples encounter on their path to reconciliation and learn effective strategies to navigate around them. Whether you're seeking to strengthen your relationship or overcome specific challenges, this video sheds light on common pitfalls and provides practical advice to ensure your journey towards reconciliation is smooth and successful. Don't let these roadblocks stand in the way of rebuilding a stronger, more connected partnership.
You Can Come Back From This
"The HOW Behind The Hurt™" online course is here to help you navigate this difficult time and come out stronger on the other side.
For just $660, you'll get recordings of 5 sessions from an actual group with worked with Beth. That is a fraction of the cost of traditional counseling or individual coaching.
Don’t let confusion and guilt keep you stuck. Enroll in “The HOW Behind the Hurt” and start uncovering the truth behind your choices so you can finally move forward with clarity, honesty, and strength.
Find Clarity and Strength in “The HOW Behind the Hurt™” Online Course
The ultimate goal of The HOW Behind the Hurt™ is to help you take full ownership, understand how your mindset made betrayal possible, and start transforming your life from the inside out.
01
SIGN UP
Sign up for "The HOW Behind The Hurt" online course and commit to the process of transforming your life.
02
ENGAGE
Engage in self-exploration, learn new tools and strategies, and work toward changing old life patterns.
03
TRANSFORM
Apply the tools and strategies discussed to create a healthier future for yourself and your relationships.
OUR MISSION
At Healing Families LLC, our mission is to empower individuals to heal from betrayal trauma and transform their lives through compassionate, evidence-based coaching. We are committed to providing a safe and supportive environment where clients can explore their emotions, rebuild trust, and develop new belief systems. Through our specialized services, including Root Cause Therapy and Neuro-Linguistic Programming, we strive to guide our clients towards resilience, personal growth, and lasting reconciliation.
Email: [email protected]
Copyright 2024. Healing Families LLC. All rights reserved.
Disclaimer: The information provided in all 1:1 sessions, online videos, masterclasses, and coaching programs are for educational and informational purposes only. Results mentioned or implied are not typical and may vary based on individual effort, commitment, and circumstances. True transformation and positive life changes can only be achieved through dedicated implementation of the strategies and techniques provided in any session and/or program. The success of your experience when working with Beth Fischer and all affiliates of Healing Families LLC is ultimately dependent on your willingness to actively participate and apply the guidance provided. Healing Families LLC and its representatives and affiliates are not responsible for any outcomes or consequences resulting from your participation in any sessions or programs.